The Closet Thing
by Kitsune89
Summary: Shikamaru x Neji, mentions of Itachi x Sasuke x Naruto, CRACK, AU.


**_Disclaimer: Not mine - it's a sad world._**

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"Come here you little shits!", Orochimaru screamed running behind Shikamaru and Neji.

"Neji, we're so dead." Shikamaru said while running. "Shika, shut up and run, fate has been little cranky today." answered Neji.

They heard Orochimaru screaming about their very painful and slow death behind them. " He is getting closer Shika, Neji said while scanning the area 'there'. Let's go there!" Neji yanked Shikamaru behind the corner and in the closet. They heard Orochimaru running past them, still screaming about their deaths.

"That was too close Neji, why in hell you were so troublesome today?" Shikamaru whined while trying to catch his breath. "Stop saying that - you liked it. Don't deny it and because of you, the fate has been very cranky."

"Troublesome, and stop that fate thing."

"Never."

"You know, you are like Lee, he has that youth thing you know and you have the fate thing.."

" We aren't similar at all!"

"hn.."

Neji was about to retord when they heard steps going by the closet, both of them stilled and tried not to breath. Then after few minutes they heard voice saying " Sasu-chaan~ not again. I'm tired and I don't think that Itachi is gonna like it before it's his turn!" They heard Naruto whining to Sasuke, they looked each of other and grinned - blackmail material! They went closer the closet door, wanting to hear more.

"I don't care what my brother wants. You are mine and that's it."

"But Sasu-chaan~..."

"No buts Naruto and don't call me Sasu-chan, usuratonkachi."

"Teme, I want Itachi too and you two decided that you would share me. So you can't just decide that I'm yours."

"hn.. baka."

"Uwaah~ Sasuke, let go of me!"

"No."

Shikamaru and Neji stared each other with blank expression - what the hell did they just hear? Slowly their brains got back to work and they went back to listening. This was more interesting than the porn at Orochimarus computer!

"Fuck, Orochimaru is coming this way. Sasuke let go of me."

"...No."

"Sasukee~ I was supposed to decorate the christmas tree. If he finds me, i'm dead."

"hn. The ."

"What? Sasukee.."

Naruto never had time to finished that sentence before Sasuke had opened the closet door and pushed him and himself to closet. They heard Orochimaru footstep coming closer - and going past them. They all sighed at relieve.

"Man that was close. Now Sasuke let go of me." Naruto whined to Sasuke, not noticing Shikamaru or Neji. Shikamaru looked to Naruto and Sasuke and noticed how mischevelled their clothes and hair were.

Naruto and Sasuke continued to argue, when Neji tooked out the cords and started to play with Shikamaru poker. Soon Naruto and Sasuke realized that they weren't only ones at the closet. They turned around and noticed Shikamaru and Neji sitting at floor playing poker.

"Shikamaru! And Neji!!! What are you doing here ~~ttebayo??"

"Troublesome. Hiding from Orochimaru of course."

"Eh? Why?"

"Because my fate is cranky...."  
"Neji, shut it. It's all Nejis fault."

"Eh???"

"No it's not, if you weren't so loud we wouldn't have never been cought."

"N-Neji, shut it!"

"Oh, is there something you wanna tell us, Shikamaru?" Sasuke grinned and looked to Shikamaru who had faint blush at his cheek.

"Are you blushing, Shikamaru?"

"No, of course not."

"You are lying, you know that don't you?"

"Shut up. Neji, show me your cards."

"Hn.. Two pairs."

"Hah, royal flush, you are bottoming tonight Neji."Shikamaru smirked to Neji who just glared him.

"Can we play too?" Naruot asked from Neji.

"Sure. Come on."

_--- few hours later, because author is lazy ---_

Jiraya walked around the mall, wonderin where the hell had Naruto disappeared. "That damn brat, Jiraya grumbeled, always disappearing." Then suddenly he heard some noice coming from the old closet, he walked to the closet and opened the door. Everyone in the closet freezed and watched Jiraya like deers trapped at car lights.

"Well, well what do we have in here, hmmm?"

"I didn't know you liked to play strip poker, Who's winning?"

"Sasuke."

"Alright, I'm playing with you." Jiraya said while shutting the behind him. Everyone just blinked and then maked room to Jiraya to sit down.

_To be continued?_


End file.
